Learn about what it’s like to work with a Holistic Doula
In this week’s blog article, I’m going to talk about the benefits of Holistic Doula Care for a confident, comfortable, and powerful birth. In this post, we’re going to take a deep dive into holistic doula care and what it’s like to work with me.
As a holistic doula, I create soul-level connections with parents based on trust and nurturing so you can follow your own compass in birth. I support you as you become the center of the spiral in pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.
You are my number one priority, and I am 100% invested in you and your family. I support you as a VIP as you find your own sense of self-direction and empowerment in pregnancy and birth. Also, I help to elevate your partner to become a meaningful member of the birth team and nurture them as an advocate.
I go where you go, and I follow your lead. I serve as a witness to your power and transformation through the birth process and into parenthood.
A Holistic Doula is a Witness to Your Power
I can’t control the destiny of your labor and birth. It would be foolish and egotistical to think that’s possible. It’s not my privilege to know or control the destiny of another person. But, it is a privilege to enter the transformation with you and become your witness. (Thanks to Whapio for the inspiration for these words!)
My measurement of success in my work is not the TYPE of birth (such as vaginal, natural, medicated, c-section, home birth, hospital birth, etc.) but that you felt nurtured, supported, and empowered in your choices.
Nurturing & Soul-Level Relationships
As a holistic doula, I want you to feel nurtured and empowered to follow your own compass and take the lead in your birth. My experience tells me that this makes all the difference.
When families share their stories of a traumatic birth, it often has little to do with the physical or medical aspects of their care. The trauma seems to arise from their sense of centering in the experience, the level of respect and nurturing shown by care providers, and their ability to make educated and informed choices on their own terms.
The Holistic Doula Model of Care – Quantum Care
Something I have been seeing a lot lately is how doula support has become modeled around the medical model of care.
What does this mean?
I see that doulas are starting to work in big organizations, partnerships, and agencies where they switch off between which doula is on call to support a client. This essentially means that, as a parent, you don’t know who your support person is going to be.
This sounds an awful lot like the medicalized model of care that we see in hospitals. The big OB and midwifery groups rotate shifts with many other people. You have no idea who is going to attend your birth, and you might not have even met this person before.
Shift Your Perspective…
Think about this from the perspective of the birthing person. You have no idea what nurse will be there for your birth. You have no idea what doctor you’re going to see. You’re set up to basically walk into the hospital and birth with a bunch of strangers. You’re expected to open up in birth and move into one of the most vulnerable and spiritual moments of your life in a room full of strangers.
AND NOW ON TOP OF THAT… doulas are starting to model their care in the same way. Now your doula might be someone you’ve spent very little time with one on one.
Most doulas in groups or partnerships will meet with their clients once or twice, in one-hour meetings. Sometimes they meet together with a client, sometimes they split the meetings so you meet each person once.
I Work to Build Trusting Relationships & Soul-Level Solidarity
As someone who has been a solo doula for 4 years, I don’t think I could ever develop a soul-level, nurturing, and trusting connection with someone that I’ve had such little time with. This is the hallmark of the differences between holistic and mainstream doula care.
It is totally possible to have incredible emotional attunement with a birthing family in any interaction regardless of the level of relationship. However, building a relationship develops another layer of trust, honor, and support that is otherwise inaccessible.
As a birthing person, when I had my babies, (and yes I’ve birthed with and without a doula so I know the difference) I wouldn’t be comfortable with not knowing who is going to support me in birth.
The medical system already puts so many unknowns onto birthing families…
Birth is such a transformational moment. Why are doulas doing this too?
In my care as a holistic doula, you know who you’re going to have by your side in birth. I have a dedicated & experienced back up doula who has worked side by side with me at births. She also supported me in birth, so I intimately know her work.
Let’s Walk the Journey Together
Developing soul-level connections and trusting bonds are the hallmark of my care as I support you through pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I’m there to walk with you through this journey, wherever we end up going together.
I offer you my time, energy, and attention so that we can build solidarity in this journey. All people come into birth with their own spaces that need nurturing and care. I take the time to get to know you and your family and learn how I can help you reach your goals for your pregnancy and birth.
Holistic Doula as a Family Advocate
Also, as a holistic doula I support the family as an advocate. Yes, an advocate. I work with you and your partner to help prepare you with the system-savvy skills you need to navigate the childbirth care system. I work with your care providers – the doctors, nurses, and midwives – as a team to help support you in birth.
Firstly, I do believe that there are scenarios in which a birthing person is unable to advocate for themselves and SHOULD NOT HAVE TO. You shouldn’t be at the most vulnerable moment of life, in a spiritual altered state of consciousness, and be forced to constantly advocate for your every need.
Secondly, that is unrealistic, affects labor progress, and just makes no damn sense for birth. I support you and your partner with the system-savvy skills you need for an undisturbed birth.
Lastly, in the spirit of full transparency, many families hire me because they want a family advocate. They’re not just hiring me for hip squeezes and backrubs. They want a support person who knows how to be a neutral communication professional in support of their goals for birth.
Let’s Build Advocacy Together
Birth is hard enough. Let’s work on the advocacy together. I have developed a lot of communication skills over the years that really help me work with your care team in solidarity and allow me to work as an advocate for your wishes when you are unable to do so yourself.
What good am I if I stay silent? Why am I even doing this work if I stay silent through injustice?
When I say this, I don’t mean that I speak for you.
You’re a strong, badass, birthing person and you’re totally capable of doing that as you want. But viewing birth from the eyes of a family advocate is incredibly supportive to the birth experience.
A “Neutral” Family Advocate
A family advocate has the knowledge and wisdom to provide families with neutral information to help them make real decisions aligned with their values and goals for birth. A family advocate facilitates conversations with the care team to support you in using your voice and making choices in birth.
I don’t speak for you, but I hold the space and facilitate communication so that you can feel empowered in your own personal advocacy. I help your partner feel elevated as an important member of the birth team and I prepare them with skills to advocate for the family.
Advocacy Must Be in Solidarity
A lot of people believe that “advocacy” is confrontation and somehow negative. True advocacy comes from a place of solidarity. I strive to build positive, cooperative, and empowering relationships with your care team so that we can all support each other to support YOU. Because YOU are the center.
As a holistic doula, I help you get in touch with what you really want in pregnancy, birth and postpartum and we work together as a team to make that happen. I believe that you are the source of knowledge in your experience, and you are the center of the spiral.
What you’ll experience with a holistic doula…
I’ve also moved away from calling our meetings “prenatals.” I feel like that term is so clinical and again taken from the medical model of care. I don’t provide anything medical, and I want to flip the script on this terminology to make that very clear. Our meetings are called “birth strategy sessions” because no matter what your desires are for birth, you need to develop a strategy to achieve your goals.
I offer two, 90-minute birth strategy sessions where we work together to discover your big ideas for birth, explore your goals and your heart felt desires, build a trusting soul-level relationship, plan your birth and explore your choices, practice strategies for comfort in labor, make a plan for system-savvy advocacy skills for birth so you can navigate the childbirth care system in confidence, and so much more.
I also offer:
- connections with trusted local professionals to support the mind/body/spirit connection in pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.
- a huge body of knowledge as a childbirth educator and mother of four to offer resources and education.
- 30 minute check-in meetings so we can stay in close contact throughout your pregnancy.
- support through your labor and birth as a trusted witness, guide, and pillar of emotional support.
- support in the blissful golden hour and breastfeeding.
- a postpartum visit in your home in the first two weeks to check in and offer resources, support, and nurturing.
As a doula, I serve as a witness to this transformation. Your body has the ancient genetic code to embark on this entire journey. I work to be a witness to your transformation, and I support the sacred space in which you give birth.
I fully believe that you are the center of the spiral in birth. You are the ultimate source of wisdom, and you know exactly what you and your baby need as you go on this journey together.
I’m there to support you through the transformation and serve as an anchor, protecting your sacred space. After birthing 4 babies, I have an intimate personal understanding of this process and the transformational changes that are unique to birth.
Want to connect with me?
Join my Facebook group called Follow Your Own Compass. Connect with other parents who want to follow their own compass in birth and get tons of free resources to support your journey.
I have an amazing new course called the Blissful Birth Mini-Course. This course lays the foundation for a confident, peaceful, and powerful birth. I teach this course through my strategy called the 3 R’s – relaxation, ritual, and radical love. Check out this online course to help you have a confident and powerful birth! The link is right in the episode notes. I’m offering this course to you at just $7, although the resources in it are worth $57.
If you’d like to get to know me a little more, feel free to schedule a complimentary consult call. I’d love to learn more about how I can support your family in birth. Check out the link in the show notes to schedule YOUR call today.